On this 30th Anniversary of Alex Cox's Sid and Nancy we learn that Sid and Johnny are naughty boys, that you can want a pizza and smell like one too, that sox is boring, ugly, hippie shyte, that it's a real drag looking like an established star, that the Rock Head does.not.do.d.rugs, that John got beat up by fascists, the being a Rude Boy is evidently a family run industry, that the four cruelest words in the English language are "no women on the tour," that you have no right to be strung out when you can be selling healthy anarchy, that fire is a beautiful thing, that stabbing your girlfriend is on the serious end of your frack up scale and that...Love Kills.
In this episode of Game of Thrones, we learn that Cersei is back in black, that the Mountain is a party animal, that Tommen has gone out the window, that Loras is really super sorry for what he did, that Margery is the smartest person in a room full of burning people, that Grand Maester Pycelle is done kidding around, that Septa Unella is ready to die, that the Freys and Lannisters send their regards, but mostly the Lannisters, that killing Edmure would be rude, that Arya is back on the murder wagon, that Sam and Gilly are evidently in a Peter Jackson movie, that Davos is pretty clear that burning children alive is a bad thing, that Melisandre isn't so sure, that Daario Neharis is the new Lord of the Friendzone, that Tyrion has finally gotten some respect, that Littlefinger wants to get his little finger into Sansa weirwood, that Cold Hands is really attached to his horse, that Ned can really keep a promise, that Lady Mormont can own a roomful of Vikings and that the Unsullied evidently plan to stand on deck all the way to Westeros
In this episode of Game of Thrones we learn that Dany has options besides burning everyone to death, for example she could just burn mostly everyone to death, or burn everyone only mostly to death, that Grey Worm can't count to one, that Drogon and the Dolthraki are really good at sneaking up on people, that Tyrion appreciates a good Armada, that Ramsay misses Sansa, that Tormund doesn't like wine and never studied the Battle of Cannae, that having a father isn't always such a great deal, that Euron has a big...fleet...that Yara makes no demands, that Rickon doesn't run sideways, that Sansa can REALLY keep a secret, that Ramsay HAS studied the battle of Cannae, that Wun Wun will do more than hold the door and that Ramsay's dogs are loyal beasts.
In this episode of Game of Thrones, we learn that Lady Crane has stabbed, like, a lot of dudes, but never learned to cook, that Arya has a good deal of intestinal fortitude, that the Hound has been axing around about the Brotherhood, that fighting the Mountain is no time to lose your head, that Pod has a keen military mind, that Bronn is a sneaky guy, that the Blackfish is more stubborn than Brienne, that Lady Sansa is exactly like her mother, that trial by combat is a brutish tradition, that Cleganebowl has been Cleganeblocked, that the Unsullied do not drink, but Missande does, that Grey Worm make joke, that Edmure thinks himself a decent man, that the Blackfish hasn't swung a sword in anger for years, that Drogon can land on a helipad, that the Brotherhood are not butchers, that the Hound prefers chicken and that the Waif is out there, she can't be bargained with, she can't be reasoned with, she doesn't feel pity or remorse or fear...and she absolutely will not stop...ever...until a girl is dead.
In this episode of Game of Thrones, we learn that Tommen's got the blue balls, that Lady Olenna is over Cersei and her bullshit, that Wun Wun believes in Jon Snow, that Lyanna Mormont gives her men to closers only, that House Glover is more than a bit conflicted, that Jaime is ready to parlay, after he slaps a few Freys around, that Sansa writes letters to Tiger Beat, that Ian McShane is only mostly Deadwood, that Theon's gotta get busy living or get busy dying, while Yara gets busy tucking the fits off her friend and that Arya is losing the Game of Crones
On this episode of Game of Thrones, we learn that Brann can be quite a drag, that Gilly is quite lovely, that Margery is fascinated by Sparrows who don't make her walk naked through the city, that Mace Tyrell is quite the little peacock, that Joffrey died eating dry pie, that the whole world is laughing at the Freys, that Cersei will always have the Mountain, that the Blackfish must be dealt with, that Benjen Stark has grown older and colder, comfortably numb, that Sam will never wield Heartsbane and that Dany plans on doing something! Someday! Yay!
In this episode of Game of Thrones, we learn that Sansa and Arya enjoy Ned cosplay, that Euron makes a compelling case, that the Iron Islands primary season is rough to say the least, that the children of the forest have some cold friends, that Jorah is under orders to cure himself, that Daario has no lines this week, that Tyrion and Varys want the support of the God of Tits and Wine...or at least just Tits...and that Hodor has always had one job.
In this episode of Game of Thrones we learn that Jon just wants to get warm, there Sansa has done nothing to forgive, that Brienne doesn't forgive and she doesn't forget, Tyrion is rich and doesn't own slaves, Grey Worm and Missandei don't trust the Masters, that Daario is aware that no matter what he does he's a dick, that Jorah knows his clock is ticking, that even a tiny Khaleesi has to make water, that Margery will most certainly NOT be doing the walk of atonement, that Theon is sorry for being sorry, that Tormund has a girlfriend and that it's not wise to threaten to rape fireproof white girls.
In this episode of Game of Thrones, we learn that Dany will always have Vaes Dolthrak, that Jon Snow knows nothing and he saw nothing, that the Artist Formerly Known As Stannis the Mannis was not the Prince to be, that "I did what I thought was right and I got murdered for it" are the new words of House Stark, that Ser Davos believes in failing fast and failing often, that when someone asks Jon Snow if he's a god, he doesn't say yes, that Tormund will bear hug a man with a half dozen stab wounds in his chest, that Dolorous Edd read Reddit (your eyes are still brown!), that one sword fight is enough for one day, that Dany's body double has impressive side-boob, that Tyrion is up for a game of Cards Against Westeros, that Qyburn has a child army, that Pycelle the Flatulent fears Silent Bob, that a girl can see, that Rickon has been growing like a weed and that the man who passes the sentence swings the sword...until his watch is ended.
In this episode of Game of Thrones, we learn that Lyanna rides a pale horse, that "I'll Ring Your Head Like A Bell" are the true words of House Stark, that Hodor Hodor Hodor Hodor, that Baelon is too old for the Bridge of Unusual Ricketiness, that Arya Stark is still a stick fightin' woman, that Davos has nothing to apologize for, that Wun Wun won one, son!, that Melisandre is absent minded about her ability to raise the dead (oh, yeah, I can totally do that!), that Roose Bolton is one trusting guy, and so is Walda, that babies make good doggie treats, that Tyrion has a way with dragons, that the High Sparrow has some low motives, that there's no moot like a King's moot that home...is where Theon wants to be..and that Jon Snow was only MOSTLY dead.
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In this episode of Game of Thrones, we learn that Jon Snow is one cold bastard, that Alliser Thorne is a persuasive guy, that Ser Davos can't hunt for mutton, that if you want to see tomorrow you picked the wrong room, that Myranda is good meat, that Jaime wants to fuck everyone who is not Cersei as well as everyone who is Cersei, that weak men will never rule Dorne again, but they may write a few Dorne storylines, that Margery isn't without sin, that Oberyn probably would have been a lousy ruler, that the Dolthraki are kind of dicks, that Ser Jorah has Bilbo Baggins-like ring-finding powers, and that sometimes seeing a woman naked for the first time is further down the list of great things in life than you would imagine.
In this episode, we learn that Jimmy's mama loved him, not so much Chuck, that Chuck did not consent to an EKG, that the Hippocratic Oath only applies when your patient is not a passive aggressive hypochondriac, that Jimmy has Chuck right where Jimmy wants Chuck, that Ernesto misses the mail room, that Betsy Brandt was on a Betsy Break, that Mike is still the guy who doesn't pull the trigger, unless the target is made of paper and that expecting Chuck to forgive himself for a mistake is WISHFUL THINKING!
In this episode, we learn that Mike is Batman because he won't pull the trigger, that Chuck never makes mistakes, that Nacho is too smart to be a criminal, that Kim is the Real Kim Shady, that Carnac has all the answers, that video tapes are expensive to erase, that Jimmy has a jawline (contrary to popular myth), that to be a filmmaker you have to grow a pair, that Chuck is an Officer of the Court(tm), that everyone makes mistakes, that Jimmy is not perfect and that no one would listen to Hercule Poirot if he was nuttier than a bag of pralines.
In this episode of Better Call Saul, we pack some Major Fudge
In this episode, we learn that there are wolves and sheep in this world, that birds are in the habit of dropping guns at crime scenes, that Jimmy's got Heavy Heart and is stressed out, that the answer, my friend, is blowing in the wind, that the Santa Fe watershed is down two inches, that juice is good food, that bagpipes are relaxing if you just put your lips together and blow, that money is no object for Mike, that Kim isn't in Kansas anymore...or Nebraska...and that for Wexler AND McGill, two firms are better than one!
In this episode, we learn that Jimmy enjoys playing with his balls, that pull out couch bed is for tenant only, that some cups are not meant for holders, that Howard Hamlin fucks pigs with the best of them, that Slippin' Jimmy is preferable to Singin' Jimmy, that evidently carbon paper is still a thing, that Mike can go full Crash Cohle when he wants to, but you have to try hard to scare him, that Hector drives a hard bargain, that Nacho is worried about "that thing," that Kaylee thinks the pool is just "okay," that the Cousins can Batman their way on to a roof with the best of them, that a watched pot never boils and that Dale the Engineer is, indeed, a live one.
In this episode, we learn that Jimmy can tell a joke but Chuck can't, that no one saves Kim but Kim, that Erin is a pixie ninja, that defendants tend to vomit and are all scumbags, that braindead suckwads go away, that Kim has her plate full in doc review, that the Gypsy Kings do it their way, that Chuck can't make coffee, that when you're in Dutch, you're in Dutch, that Howard is a cowboy, but fucks pigs with the best of them, that Hector is familiar (he rings a bell), that rattling means we have something to celebrate, that Chuck and Jimmy's dad kept food on the table and cash in the till and that Mike makes a half measure.
In this episode, we learn that Jimmy is not a team player, that Sandpiper doesn't keep the lights on, that Tuco has (shock surprise) a taste for meth, that Kim is in the cornfield, that Nacho tells a good story, that two space blankets are better than one, that Chuck will not be baited, that Mike (shock surprise) knows his guns, that Jimmy wants to make a deal, that the ends don't justify the means, that Jimmy needs to hear it from Chuck's mouth, that Nacho's real problem is not Tuco, that Krazy-8 is employee of the month and that Mike is fully insured...and can take a punch.
In this episode, we learn that Chuck is here to do more than bear witness, that Mike is not the worrying kind, that we're ready for our closeup, Mr. McGill, that no one likes Kid Kubrick, that Jimmy is an eccentric arsonist, that Kim likes stories about men trapped on poles, that there's nothing sadder than being footsie blocked and that Caesar's wife must not show any hint of solicitation.
In this episode, we learn that Howard didn't stand in Jimmy's way, that someone named Rebecca Bois is evidently a person, that the Playuh Wagon is practically Jurassic, that even artificial light can ruin baseball cards, that Pryce cries believably, that alligator clashes with Buick, that Nacho underestimates people's stupidity, but not Tuco's temper, that they really like cobbler in Hoboken, that Chuck is here to bear witness, that hugs are for customer only and that Kim Wexler prefers pie that is untouched by human buttocks and by falsified evidence.
In this episode of Better Call
Saul, we learn that one thing has nothing to do with another, that
cucumber water is still for customers only, that going it alone is
how Price rolls, that hummingbirds can really hit their mark, that
women in bikinis often travel with women in parkas, that Slippin'
Kimmie likes to break bad, that Charlize Theron is technically
African American, that there's no limit in how much you can invest
in the stock market, that managing a Cinnabon isn't as romantic as
it looks, that the first 48 hours are crucial when investigating
stolen baseball cards, that Jimmy will be getting his Cocobolo desk
and that some switches should never, ever, be flipped.
At the movies, we learn that somedays Leo gets the bear and some days the bear gets Leo in Revenant, that stop motion sex can be realistic in Anomalisa, that betting against the American economy is fun and profitable in The Big Short, that there are no heroes in sex abuse scandals in Spotlight, that Star Wars is fun again with The Force Awakens, that Michael Moore knows Where To Invade Next, that the sleep of reason gives birth to Demons and that slapping actors is more fun than blowing up islands in Hail Caesar!